poderput 'er thereto be able to

Linkword Stories:

Put ’er there.” said the man, offering his right hand for a handshake.

Bill froze. He had a very particular social problem: he wasn’t able to shake hands. It wasn’t a fear of germs, it was just that his mind would freeze up thinking of all the steps it took to shake hands. Have you ever actually thought about it? You have to get your hand into just the right place, but you can’t look at their hand: you have to look them in the face. And then you have to grip with just the right pressure. Oh, and there was the question of your hand temperature and dryness. How hard should you shake, and what was the accepted vertical range of motion?

No, Bill wasn’t afraid of shaking hands. He just wasn’t able to do it in a reasonable amount of time. By the time he was done thinking it through and finally ready to shake, the other person invariably had thought that Bill was blowing them off.

Oh, how many business deals Bill had been sure he was going to close right up until the other party wanted to shake on it and said “Put ’er there.” Maybe he would have to stop doing business with people from the South…

2013-06-19 02:48